Stranded Alive (Highlander: The Raven)

[estinose]

Summary: Nick tries to cope with the end result of Amanda's action in "Dead on Arrival".

Disclaimer: Nick, Amanda, and anyone else mentioned belong to Rysher, Gaumont, and others. This thing, on the other hand, is mine.

Spoilers: the end of "Dead on Arrival" (the season/series finale)

Author's Notes: Another Nick piece. Sorry. Anyway, this is a little introspective piece dealing with what happens to Nick at the end of the series.

Stranded Alive
by Estirose
Copyright 1999

Nick stormed through the streets of Paris until he came to a park. He really didn't want to sit down, but the bench looked wonderful and so he dropped down onto it as if it was his only refuge.

Immortal. He closed his eyes, trying to absorb what had happened to him. Tried to weave everything Amanda had told him about Immortality, from the moment he knew what she was to the moment he'd woken up from being shot. He'd have to live on that knowledge, because he was sure not going back to Amanda. Not to the woman who had made him Immortal without asking him first.

Better leave before the Watchers realized what he was. He didn't know how closely they watched, and certainly didn't mind slipping from that net of well-meaning historians. Amanda may have called them a 'necessary evil', but that didn't mean he had to put up with that particular annoyance of Immortal life. He didn't need to have some pipsqueak recording every time he went to the bathroom.

Was it worth it to go back and pick up his stuff? He'd at least have to pick up his passport if he planned to go back home. Meyers could smuggle him out if worst came to worst, but he didn't know how to explain his problems with Amanda without bringing up Immortality. Best to wait out of range and let Amanda leave before packing up.

What if Amanda had his passport? He shivered, realizing that that was entirely possible. Amanda's ethics tended to be a little bit questionable sometimes, even if her heart was in the right place. She might hope to keep him there, try to reason with him, or if worst came to worst, try to charm him into staying. He'd fallen under her charm once, and he wasn't quite sure if he could escape doing so again.

Gazing into nothing, he wondered what he'd gotten himself into. In the space of less than a year, he'd met a very interesting thief, become attracted to her, tried to avenge her death, ended up staying in Paris, and become Immortal. He'd come across many Immortals, most of which were worse than Amanda. He'd even quickly learned that most of them were a bit hard to arrest (if he had still been a cop), as Amanda had been.

Time to go home, then move where Amanda could never find him again. He had no doubt that she cared for him, to the extent that she was overprotective at times. Given what he'd found himself in, he could understand sometimes, but right now... right now it was far too much to bear. He couldn't see her again, not the woman who forced him into this stupid Game just because she couldn't bear to be without him.

He could understand that, had understood it when he had gone to avenge her death. Even as he sat there, he knew that they'd had an effect on each other, far more than either of them had probably thought possible. Now, he had to leave, no matter what he felt about her. It was better this way, to leave before his heart collapsed from the pain.

But he had a new life ahead of him, possibly a long one if he was skilled and lucky. Thanks to Amanda, he had forever to recover and to understand. Maybe even to forgive. If he got away from her. If he could live without her shadowing him out of worry.

Tired, he got up to plod back to Sanctuary. He was not going home.

-end